Thursday, July 4, 2013

battle weary prayers


I have been told that I am to transparent.  That I need to keep some of what is in my heart back so as to not give people the wrong impression about what I am trying to say.  

Allow me then to reiterate my intention with being so upfront and transparent in writing the blogs.  If I lay my heart out for others to see, could it not be possible that it becomes a source of encouragement to someone who might be going through the same struggle?  Who might be thinking “I am the only one!  Something must be wrong with me!”  Some of the greatest moments of freedom in my life have occurred when I have heard other’s transparency and guilelessness.  I have meant  no disrespect or offense to anyone with these posts.  If I have offended, PLEASE forgive me! 


That being said, let me be transparent now.  

I don’t know about the rest of you but the past few months have been
 HHHHHAAAAARRRDDDDDD!!!!!  

The mental battles have been the WORST I have ever struggled with!  The hopelessness and discouragement has come from ALL sides and in forms that I never expected.   The lie of “Myranda, you just need to SUCK IT UP, there are others suffering with some serious stuff!” has been running through my head.  Not knowing how to put things into words or ask for help in prayer has been horribly difficult.  

FEEL ME FOLKS!?  I KNOW for a fact I ain’t the only one!!!!   I know cause my Mom, probably one of the most godly women I know called me last week and told me she completely understood what I have been going through because she has been there herself.  She wrote me this....

Walking in the presence of God also includes the relationships He wants for us to build with those He has chosen for us to walk with.  He never expects us to make this journey alone.  If the burden seems to heavy, usually it is because we are not depending on others to help us carry it.  Others who are not in the battle can give instructions that can help clear the fog.   I say this to say please never hesitate to let Dad and I know when you are struggling under such burdens.  We can help you pray through things.

That simple statement from a woman who has suffered and tested the Word of God in ways that make my head spin convicted me to my core.  It made clear to me the lie I have been believing that I need to just “SUCK IT UP BUTTER CUP!”.  Yes, there is a measure of that which is necessary, we don’t want to be ruled by self pity, however, we need to not be afraid of being vulnerable.  

I have been in these verses in James for at lest a month and can't get past them.   Let them be water to your battle weary soul.

James 1:2-4
 Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don’t try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way.

1 comment:

  1. Hey Myranda! I'm woefully behind on reading your blog, and am just now catching up on several months of your posts, and you're blessing my socks off. I, for one, am grateful for your transparency. I hear ya, big time. And it occurred to me reading this, I wonder if people told David the same thing, that perhaps he should not have been so transparent, that perhaps he should hold back a bit when he wrote his songs, that he wasn't putting forth an appropriate image of a king - where would we be if he had listened to those voices? Love you bunches!

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