This morning I sent my eldest born off on a camping trip for 5 days with her class. We got into a screaming fight right before she got into the car with her dad to be whisked away into the bush....the AFRICAN BUSH for FIVE DAYS!
She wanted control over how and what to pack in her bag and I, being a mother, wanted to make sure she has enough undies and jeans. Cut me some slack! She was trying to pack a pair with a wet waist band and I had a panic that her entire bag was going to be wet and mildewy by the time she reached the campsite. I AM A MOM!!! I CAN’T HELP IT! I just sent my baby off FOR FIVE DAYS IN THE AFRICAN BUSH! Did I mention that she can’t take her phone so we can’t call!?
We must have looked a sight! I was there in my pj and racoon eyes from yesterdays make up shouting ‘ALL I WANT IS FOR YOU TO HAVE WHAT YOU NEED’ while Amira is giving me the sideways evil eye......yeah, not my most dignified moment.
Can I just PULEASE crawl back in bed and start all over!?
After she left and I thought it through it hit me with force....she isn’t five! My baby is growing! She is no longer the round faced, apple cheeked red headed wonder....She is now grown into a tall red headed beauty with a mind of her own. (to be honest I like it that way! I want my girls to be strong and confident!) All she wanted was the control over how and what to pack in her bag. And I need to trust that she can pack her own jeans and that she knows how many pairs of underwear and socks she will need for the trip.
But in my defense, I AM A MOM!!!! And I always will be!!! It is hard to let go! Is that why God has us raise teenagers BEFORE they officially leave for their own lives? It is a little bit of letting go every day.
Parenting is HHHAAARRRDDDD work! We won’t get it right all the time and that is perfectly ok! How else are our kids going to learn that it is ok to make mistakes? How else will our kids learn about the grace and mercy of Jesus unless they see us fall flat on our faces and show some transparency and humble honesty when we apologize?