did i spell "quandrie" right?

Up at 3 am again......Probably not a good idea to take a comma inducing sleep aide at 8 pm. Shoulda waited the one more hour.   JET LAG YOU ARE MY NEMESIS!

But the up side to this is having the house all to myself perfectly still and quiet.  Alone with my thoughts and Jesus.

I had a good chat with a friend yesterday about life and all its quandries.  Here was the question that we were asking ourselves.  

Do we let our quandries define us or do we allow God to use those quandries

 to define more of Jesus in our lives?

   

(quandry is fun to say) 

Hurt and pain happen, its a fact.  Sometimes the hardest thing about life is dealing with the people in it. Feel me?    Misunderstandings happen, abuses happen, lies are told and manipulations occur.   And its all relative to ones experiences and where they are in life.   What hurts me might not you, and vise versa.

Do we sweep things under the rug and pretend they didn't happen?  OF COURSE NOT!   Sweep enough under there and you have a lumpy rug that you will trip on all the time.

Do we lash out at the one who caused the pain in an attempt to make them see how badly we are hurting.  (I speak from experience that DOESN'T WORK!)

From my own experience I can say this....God fights for those he calls his own!  When we stand still in the presence of God and allow his healing balm to cover our wounds, he fights for us!  TRULY HE DOES!  He turns our ashes into something beautiful and true worship comes.   He gives us the opportunity to confront if necessary and the right words come.

I just recently had an experience where I saw this play out beautifully in my own life.  I had been hurt in one of those raw life altering ways.  It sent me into a tail spin for quit some time and I wrestled with God.  My prayers were

"God I know that what I am feeling isn't ok, but you gotta help me!  I don't wanna be bitter and angry!  JESUS HELP!"  

And BOOM, out of no where I was allowed an opportunity that was God ordained for me to confront the issue.  It was done in love, but firm.  I was able to say what was on my heart with out being hurtful or angry.  I was able to hear the other person's heart and forgiveness and mercy ruled the day.

Back in Zambia for 2014

Back in Zambia and my head is spinning...literally....jet lag is a butt kicker!   Thank you Jesus for Stilnox. (an amazingly rock your face off sleep aid).  I think the person who invented this wonder drug MUST BE a born again Spirit filled lead by the Holy Ghost Christian.  THEY ARE AWESOME! 

We left Lusaka at the end of November, hot and ultra sweaty and landed in NYC to brisk cold winds.  What an assault on the senses!  I had to teach Brooklyn how to put on a coat and tie a scarf properly.  The child had no clue.  She balked at having to wear closed toed shoes.  I have a particulary vivid memory of her, mear days after our arrival, sitting down in the middle of Target moaning that she wanted to take her shoes off and me trying vainly to explain that it isn’t ok to run around barefoot in the Rockaway, NJ shopping complex.   

In Africa it is shoes optional.  No one looks at you crossed eyed like you are the redneckednest of mothers if your kid is in the store barefoot.  Oh the difficult life of a missionary kid! 

I have wrestled and wrestled with how to put into words this next section, lest you think that I am having a crisis of the soul or am  doubting God cause thats not the case AT ALL!

When we arrived in the States the cry of my heart was 

OH GOD YOU HAVE TO GIVE ME SOMETHING TO HOLD ONTO OR I CANNOT GET BACK ON THAT PLANE!!!!

At the TSC volunteers banquet I wept in the presence of God like I haven't in a long time when the choir sang about our weakness and God's strength.  About how God sees us right where we are at and will never loose sight. 

Pastor Carter preached a message about Jesus being wrapped in weakness as a baby that left me trembling in my soul at the amazing humility of God.  You have to listen to it!!!

I stood in line at the TSC Christmas dinner helping serve roasted potatoes and many of you told me that you pray for our family.  THAT MEANS THE WORLD!!!!!

I watched several young people that I had influences on in one way or another when they were kids standing on the stage and worshiping God with all their hearts.  God gently spoke to my heart "There will always be fruit!"

Several other moments God gently spoke to me in a still small voice that we are pointed in the right direction and it came at the right moment.  

Are we allowed to get to the moments of OH GOD I CAN'T ANYMORE so that we are reminded that it doesn't have a thing to do with us?  

Hidden in the shadow of the wings of God is where we should be found.  If our hearts desire is to dwell in the house of God, our plans and our abilities fade into the back ground.  The load becomes a bit lighter.  And it is in that place that the sacrifices he asks of us make sense.  

My prayer for all of us in this coming year is that we be found hidden in the cleft of the rock of God's love and mercy.  That when war is raged on our souls we will be confident in God's word and in ability to carry us through with a song in our hearts.  

Psalm 27

¹ The Lord is my light and my salvation—
    whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the stronghold of my life—
    of whom shall I be afraid?

² When the wicked advance against me
    to devour^[a] me,
it is my enemies and my foes
    who will stumble and fall.
³ Though an army besiege me,
    my heart will not fear;
though war break out against me,
    even then I will be confident.

⁴ One thing I ask from the Lord,
    this only do I seek:
that I may dwell in the house of the Lord
    all the days of my life,
to gaze on the beauty of the Lord
    and to seek him in his temple.
⁵ For in the day of trouble
    he will keep me safe in his dwelling;
he will hide me in the shelter of his sacred tent
    and set me high upon a rock.

⁶ Then my head will be exalted
    above the enemies who surround me;
at his sacred tent I will sacrifice with shouts of joy;
    I will sing and make music to the Lord.

⁷ 

¹³ I remain confident of this:
    I will see the goodness of the Lord
    in the land of the living.
¹⁴ Wait for the Lord;
    be strong and take heart
    and wait for the Lord.

God's provision!

I have had many discussions with friends over the past few weeks about our years.  The theme that keeps coming up is that we have all been through the valley this year.  Some of it has been internal, some has been external, but all of us, it seems, have been brought to the point of crying out to God because there was no other choice.  

One story stands out in my mind.....

A friend was taking the train home from work where he would then get his car and drive the few miles to his house.  He was worried because there wasn't enough gas in the car and he has no extra cash to remedy the situation.  He called his wife and asked her to pray.  Needless to say my friend was at that point.  His prayer was "Oh God!  I can't solve this one!  There is no way out of this!  You promised that you wouldn't leave me ashamed in the day of adversity......PLEASE JESUS!!!!"  On the platform of the train station he met a friend who also needed a ride home because he was in the same financial situation and his car wasn't running.  My friend says "Ok, but I have no gas and no money to buy any, so we will try."  His friend told him "Well guess what, I have an extra 10 dollars and its yours if you just help me get home"

Both men in the story are godly men who love their families and are walking pure before God!  They haven't done anything wrong or sinful to put themselves in the financial situation they see themselves in, it is just that God is walking them through something hard and valuable at the same time.   God showed them both that day that He sees exactly where they are at and cares deeply about their needs and will never leave their families or forsake them! 

 

I have been there many times this year!  (See my post MY PORK TROTTER MIRACLE and MY MATTRESS MIRACLE)  

We are living in dangerous times at Christians.  As American's we are no longer allowed to openly speak our minds and as Christians living in the last days the Devil is out to steal kill and destroy all that God has placed in our hearts. 

We HAVE to walk through the valley!  All other options but Jesus have to be stripped away from us so that we can learn to Stand Still and See the Salvation of the Lord!  

This scripture has been running through my mind for a bout a week now........

Psalm 27:4-5

New International Version (NIV)

⁴ One thing I ask from the Lord,
    this only do I seek:
that I may dwell in the house of the Lord
    all the days of my life,
to gaze on the beauty of the Lord
    and to seek him in his temple.
⁵ For in the day of trouble
    he will keep me safe in his dwelling;
he will hide me in the shelter of his sacred tent
    and set me high upon a rock.

May our one and only hearts desires be to dwell in the house of the Lord, to be found hidden under the shadow of His wings.  That is the only safe place!  That is the only refuge where we will find true and lasting security and provision!  

       

wrapped in weakness

Now that we are reaching the end of another year the time for self reflection has arisen.

(did I just use the word ARISEN!?   oh my)

For me 2013 has been a year full of.....how shall I put it.....personal trials that threatened at times to pull me under the rip tide of my flesh.  The lies the Devil has thrown at me have made me wanna put my hands over my ears and sit in a corner humming to myself.

"What do you think you are doing in Zambia?  This isn't a game!"  And my personal favorite "You have no clue what you are doing, you should just go home and leave this to the experts"

I have had to wrestle with my assumptions of what I thought was correct and all I have been taught over the years about submission and authority.  I have had to learn aspects of myself that have scared me, shamed me and brought me to my knees before God.    The glaring pride of my own achievements masked in humility.....GROSS!!  

To put in in other words, God has had to shake my tree so that the gross worm ridden fruit had to fall to the ground.  Jesus, the ever vigilant gardener of my soul has had some serious pruning to do in 2013. 

In the coming year when trials come, when difficult times hit and you are forced to your knees in dependance on the provision of God, please remember that God SEES YOU!  God HEARS you and God will NOT forget you!  

You must understand that I am writing this to myself as much as I write it to you.

I heard the most amazing message yesterday that helped remind me of the fact that God is in control!  Pastor Carter spoke about the sign of Jesus' birth and about how he would be wrapped is swaddling clothes.  All babies were wrapped in swaddling clothes, so what was so special about this baby?

I won't re-preach the sermon, but I will give you the point he was making.  Jesus, the creator of Heaven and Earth.....he who formed man out of dust with a BREATH...humbled himself and allowed himself to be wrapped in our weakness FOR OUR SAKES!

Meaning this today.....God CHOOSES to use you and I for his glory not for what we bring to the table, but because when He wraps himself in our weakness and frailty his glory shines the brightest.

Let me break it down further.....It doesn't matter that I don't have a clue half the time.  All that matters is that I stand where God tells me to stand and simply watch him work.  He doesn't NEED me to reach the hearts of the street children on Lusaka.  He is the creator of heaven and earth!  He chooses then instead to wrap himself in my weakness so that I am constantly and forever reminded that Jesus Christ is the center and the answer to all our questions, concerns and hurts.  

november 2013 update...READ IT!

 2013 HAS BEEN A YEAR FULL OF CHALLENGES, BUT IT HAS ALSO BEEN A YEAR FULL OF PROGRESS. HERE ARE SOME OF THE HIGHLIGHTS FROM THIS PAST YEAR...

OUTREACH TEAM

This year we have seen more volunteers from South City Church become involved with the street outreaches. We see this as crucial to the work. Local church should be involved in outreach. Streetwise is providing just one such avenue at South City Church. We get excited about getting others excited to join the work. 

JOE: TEEN CHALLENGE COMPLETED

As of October 2013, Joe Chibanze, former street kid, drug dealer and street-life food-chain CEO (top of the chain) has completed a year at the Teen Challenge Kafue Center. He is currently helping out at the center until he departs for Swaziland to continue the program with life skills training. Joe has been invaluable on the streets, and he is a true-life story of how Christ can change a person. Just a few weeks ago we sent Samford to Teen Challenge and we hear reports that he is doing SO well! Soon David will be joining him. We are getting so excited to see God moving in the hearts of these guys. 

MOONLIT 5K FUN RUN

On September 19th, 2013, over 100 participants gathered together for a worthy cause: to support the Streetwise Outreach and raise money for it’s future endeavors. Spearheaded by Ilke Green and Nikki Timmerman, the goal was to raise awareness and support for this street kid ministry, which operates locally under South City Church. 

The result: 10,000 ZMW (a little over $1800USD). We were amazed and gobsmacked at the turn out. People from all over Lusaka, many of whom we have never met, came out to run and enjoy the event. 

STREETWISE CRAFT CO.

After years of praying about helping the street kids with something viable for their future, the idea of Streetwise Craft Co. was born. 

We are in the process of creating antique-style products for sale, with two goals: introduce a product that currently does not exist in the Lusaka market, and create a trade school which would teach street kids skills like woodworking, painting, hand lettering.....basically how to see a job through with pride and dignity in a job well done. 

We have been able to sell at craft markets around the city and have been met with an enthusiasm for the project that has left us amazed. 

We want to see kids becoming productive members and leaders in society. To recognize their God given abilities and talents. To understand that their life is valuable and worthy. 

For more information, go to: http://www.streetwisefurniture.org/about.

WHAT DOES 2014 LOOK LIKE?

Our priority in January will be to begin looking for a suitable workshop in which to develop the products. Right now we are working out of our dining room. As you can imagine that is getting a bit crowded. We want to have a place where the kids feel welcome and at home. Available to them will be two meals a day, instruction on how to use tools and projects they can begin, as well as a facility for them to bathe themselves and wash their clothes. 

We eventually want to move into power tools so that we can make higher end furniture for a slightly different market. 

WHAT DO WE NEED AND HOW CAN YOU HELP?

• Tools! Check out our wish list on amazon: http://www.amazon.com/gp/registry/wishlist/2GG1N4NGTEGK5/ref=cm_wl_rlist_go_o?

• We are looking to rent a workshop in January. 

• Do you have a skill that you think might be of some value to the work here?

• Support us as a family: If you would like to contribute to us as a family, the easiest way would be to click here: https://www.tscnyc.org/donate_tsc.php. Select “Make a one-time gift.” In the “Donate to” drop down, select “Missions–Missionary.” Our name will appear in that menu. 

The start-up of streetwise craft co. will require tools...

and a safe, suitable workshop.

YOU CAN GIVE DIRECTLY INTO STREETWISE!

We will send you a receipt for tax purposes.

BANK ACCOUNT DETAILS:South City Church | Standard Chartered (Mandahill): 0100 521 067 500Swift Code / Sort Code: SCBLZMLX

determined obedience

In 2011 we went home to New Jersey burnt out and exhausted to our very souls.  All we wanted to do was get jobs in Walmart or Home Depot and forget that Africa existed.   However that fateful summer was a turning point for us.  Through various people that we know and trust completely God confirmed His will for us to come back to Africa.  

 

With bloody knuckled determined obedience we got on a plane and came back here.  I compare that time to when we first arrived in Africa four years prior.  We were all doe eyed and dreamy about God’s plan.  “Of course all will go well, we are in God’s will”

In 2011 all we had was that God had told us to come back and the peace that comes with obedience.   It was like this  “Go or stay. I will love you no matter what.  But if you stay you will miss out BIG TIME!  You will always wonder WHAT IF!?”  

So you would think, wow, NOW it will all come together and make sense.....WRONG!!!!!  For roughly the next six months we were put in a holding pattern of frustration and angst.  

Here is my point........I am grateful for that time!  TRULY!  I am!!!

I have learned life lessons that only the fire of adversity can burn into a person’s soul.  

What would those things be Myranda?

Well, along with learning how to make my own cockroach bait and yogurt and a really awesome pumpkin soup, I think the one that ranks highest on my list is this.... 

Full time ministry has taught me that it has NOTHING TO DO WITH ME!   God didn’t call my family to Zambia because we were so spiritually gifted.  NO!  I firmly believe that Lusaka has been the place for us because this is where we have had to learn lessons of humility and brokenness that have changed our outlooks on life forever.  

Where does that leave us now? 

Streetwise (the ministry we have started) has taken off in ways that has our heads spinning!  I can’t tell you how many times Luis and I just sit in amazement at the things God has been doing that are WAY beyond us!   In January we will begin a second outreach spot.  There are pockets of kids all over the city! 

In addition to this we are also working to begin a trade school.  God has gifted Luis in carpentry and I have been shocked to learn that I have artistic talent.  So we are combining these two to make wooden signs, serving trays and decorative items for the home.  We have had our stuff out on the market for a little over a month and the response we are getting has been awesome!  I know have a list of back orders that can’t be filled until early next year. 

Our goal is to teach the kids these skills, combined with discipleship training so that they can go and start their own business or simply discover the gifts that God has given them and run with it.  

This is actually a dream we have had since before we got married!  NO JOKE!  

We will be writing more on this in the future, but I wanted to “prime the pump” so to speak and get you all thinking and praying about this incredible project that God has birthed in our hearts.  

How can you pray specifically? 

• We need tools.....we are actually working on compiling a specific list of things we need.  Please let me know if you are interested in looking at it.  
• We need a place to work out of.  Right now we work out of our house.  As we don’t have street kids working with us yet it is ok, but we are going to need a separate space sooner than we think
• We need a new work vehicle.  

As always.....WE LOVE YOU GUYS MORE THAN YOU KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Your support and encouragement keeps our heads afloat!  Like I always say

A missionary is only as effective as the people supporting them! 

(maybe I should put that on a sign?)

You guys are awesome and we love you dearly! 

SEE YOU IN DECEMBER!!!!!!!!!

my pork trotter miracle

In our 6 years of living in Africa we have learned from first hand experience that God CAN and WILL provide!

I must admit that more often than not frustration gets the better of me and I don't handle the faith testing moments with the dignified aplomb I should.  I can relate well to this little boy and his wonky bike.  When God throws a curve ball my way to teach me something I sit on my bike and cry.

Isn't God good though!?  He lets us have our fits and then gentle takes our hands and pushes us forward cause he does have a plan!!!  If we would just settle down and realize we are peddling with a weird bike, we would see that Jesus Christ is actually in control and we are not!  

Long story short.......tonight I was making dinner..... (potato soup....for those of you who are curious) I was thanking God for meeting our families needs and seeing us through every twist and turn life throws our way.  When all of a sudden....low and behold....my neighbor, who isn't a Christian.....turns up at my door with about 20 pounds of fresh on the bone pork meat.  You guys, it wasn't 2 minutes after I was finished thanking God for his wonderful provision that this happened!  Stella and her husband own a piggery and had just slaughtered this morning.  

She wanted to bring us a piece of a pig as a gift.  (there is a long story behind why, which I will write about later).  I did my best to keep from crying at the goodness of God while Stella proudly told us about her pig farm and who they supply to.   (its not culturally cool to cry in public in Zambia)

   

Does anyone out there know what to do with pork trotters?  I have a huge one now sitting in my freezer.